Tagged!

I’ve been tagged & for once I am not exactly thankful to Mr. Murali for remembering me during a tough spot.

The rules of the tag:

1) Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.
2) Players tagged should post these rules and the 8 facts.
3) Players should tag 8 other people and notify them about it.

Alright, let the games begin, I wonder why we are called ‘players’..? Anyway, 8 stupid random facts about me –

1. I was the fat-ish boy in nursery. I am sure fitting me into my dresses for my mom was as difficult as fitting a sumo wrestler into Amrita Rao’s salwar suit. I am not fat now and for all the good ladies reading this post, please email me on vikalpagarwal@gmail.com or leave a comment and I will send across lovely pictures to prove this.

2. “I don’t the drink the daaru or smoke the cigarettes.” Yea, I am the so called momma’s boy and boy friend material. But, I don’t do it simply because - I don’t want to do it. I don’t mind people calling me ‘unkewl’ and telling me how I am missing out on the ‘charms’ of college life, I enjoy my orange juices and love being myself. Change, Growth etc. are always on my to-do list, but pretending to be someone that I am not, is just not a priority.

3. I am horrible at dancing. Well, let’s just say I am scared of dancing on stage. I love to go foot loose and have been complimented for kicking ass on a dance floor, but when it comes to doing the thumkas on stage, I fret like a bheegi billi being chased by sunny deol size dog. But I want to change that, wait till I find a 36-24-36 babe to teach me how to dance ;)

4. I wasn’t good at tying shoe laces till my 10th standard. Atleast, that’s what my little brother tells me, “tu mujhe torture karta tha laces bandhwane ke liye”. I can tie them very well now & all the ‘Beautiful Gals’ in town can request for a proof test.

5. I eat very fast. Probably it all started when I wanted to line-marofy during my nursery class lunch breaks (fet-ish? go to fact 1 in order to understand the PJ). But, yea, I eat fast and I am planning to get slower because it’s not exactly the best of views to sit and wait for people chewing slower than Atal bihari Vajpayee making an independence day speech.

6. Having read more than half way through, I know you have realised this first hand - I enjoy giving ‘fatte’. Now, I know this is not a random fact and that you know that as well as a 2nd standard kid would know his a-b-c-d, but ‘actually’ the point is that I have only recently realized that my fatta’s help me (atleast!) in a very special way! I can do things that sound totally absurd to any sane person only because I think otherwise and will keep doing that until I change how I think. & more often than not, My fattas have helped me stay in good shape :) I enjoy being myself and don’t give up on my basic beliefs come what may!

7. I am lazy. As lazy as it gets, I will buzz my buddy next door on gtalk to plan a party late that night and if the internet connection is down, I’d prefer discussing it through the windows, sharing it with the paanwalas outside. I buy shoes that don’t have laces. I get my mess waale sweet bhaiyas to fill water bottles and my dhobi to wash my swimming costume! Want to hear more?

8. I love attention, much more than Rakhi Sawant. I don’t mind being talked about 24*7, of course only when people are being kind. I love it when people give me honest feedback. I guess that’s the thing I like the most!

Alrite it’s Dussehra time and like all saree shops in the town.. I am going to give you one fact free with 8 facts… I like breaking rules, and I shall prove myself on this occasion.

The 8 people I am going to tag are Mr. Salman may-be-in-jail Khan, Mr. Bill monica-is-hot Clinton, Mr. Narayan role-model Murthy, Ms. Bipasha skirts-keep-getting-shorter Basu, Ms. Teen USA (please use 8 photos instead of 8 facts), Ms. I-will-never-get old Tulsi from Kyunki Sans bhi Kabhi Bahu thee, Ms. Pratibha i-hate-her Patil & Mr. P. respectable Chidambram.

Having done that, lemme tell you why I am playing spoilt sport. I didn’t enjoy this tag too much just like you don’t like reading arbitrary nonsense about somebody. Who wants to read about what kind of a person you are except your family may be. Only the celebrities in India get paid to talk about their favourite dishes and favourite colours. I like the tags where they ask all the difficult questions and where you get to act smart by giving wacky answers. So I shall get my buddies to wait untill I get one of those tags! But hey, I promise I will inform all these people about the tag! ;) Hey wait-some-more, Golu-Timu-Abhinav I am going to tag you in order to wake you up from your eternal slumber!

Ok.. Scared of all the yawns & death threats, I am going to ‘get lost’. (you got that eh..? you @#&@#&^)

See you soon beautiful people,
Vikalp crazy Agarwal

P.S. – After reading Kotler’s latest comments on ‘Word of mouth Advertising’, I have decide to join the list of people who go on the clichéd promotion drive for their blogs.. So don’t be surprised if you read this post because my gtalk status bought you into this!

A whistle in the dark?

Most of us will soon be graduating with a significant degree of uncertainty. Even for those people who have a job, the uncertainty of what life will really be like once they join their organization can loom large. Expectations from all quarters can be huge. The pressure from peers, relatives, family (not to mention from oneself) can all add up to a disturbing concoction. Added to which, there is an implied expectation that after 15 years of formal education you should know what exactly you want to do with your life!

Whilst the Indian IT Industry seems to be on song, finding a job is not very difficult (neglect the fact that I am at a top tier college). But, at the same time there is still a considerable amount of dissatisfaction amongst people who have actually ended up with a job in the IT sector. In an era when most people look at the number of digits in the gross package offered as a measure of the ‘Aukaat’ of the company, I find it difficult even to make a career choice, forget choosing one company over the other.

Somehow, The Indian IT sector doesn’t attract me too much. Yes, the Indian IT vendors have emerged as global players; they have clocked up very good revenues & are probably poised to emerge as global champs. But even now the Indian IT companies are in the bottom half of the value chain. They still thrive on outsourced business processes and have a long way to go in competing with the Capgeminis and the IBM’s of this world. It is time the Indian IT industry differentiates itself and acquires skills that will let it compete with its global rivals. Well, that much for an analysis of the Indian IT companies.. but the real reason that keeps me away from their wannabe employees list is the very size of these firms. I would never enjoy writing code for a client sitting in some corner of the world without understanding why I am doing what. I see little scope for innovation and am insecure, for I might get lost in such huge organizations. Technology thus (despite a great internship) doesn’t excite too many of the N thousand cells inside me.

I think I would do justice to myself and my own expectations by being in a function that is more dynamic and which will always keep me on my toes. Something that can offer a challenge on a daily basis and where every day is a new day! Like I keep saying, I want to sell shampoo to a 60 year old rich balding lady! I want to be more close to the business function where common sense and logic determine the number of digits in the earnings of a firm, where I can make a quantitative contribution to the figures on the balance sheets.

Entrepreneurship seems to be a good way out of the dilemma, but it comes with its fair share of complexities. One needs a good idea (something that remains good even after few times of rethinking) and also capital can be an issue, given that not too many people give ‘weightage to raw youth’. It’s a difficult call to make, one that requires precise balance between several expectations from several people, relationships and career objectives all at the same time. Entrepreneurs are often seen as visionaries, wealth creators and sometimes even as Super Humans, but the realities facing those who actually want to start out are very different. Entrepreneurship is hard work, it can be a lonely occupation: no teashop gossip, no secure monthly pay slips. Going against others’ advice for an idea you believe in, is a touch choice too. Probably the hardest thing is ‘to take the plunge’. I really want to invent a recipe for a successful business enterprise. Most people tell me that Work Ex will make you a better candidate for the hiccups of Entrepreneurship, but I am somehow interested more in the hiccups than the smooth ride. I think, even one week of hands on entrepreneurial experience will teach me more about business than a year at a consultancy firm or a business school. Also at the same time I think a formal business education will go a long way in shaping the road ahead for me. Besides giving me an opportunity to get to know other people who are interested in similar things, it will also buy some time ‘for the idea to come to me’. Hopefully it will also help others place more confidence in me and my capabilities.

All said and done, I am faced with a decent amount of uncertainty about the future. Luckily, I am enjoying the ‘process’ and hopefully I will make the most out of the opportunities that life throws at me! If you are in similar waters, I hope that you will find the ‘right’ shore for yourself!

I am on the lookout for my Lakshya & ‘help & comments’ are always welcome! Cheerio! :-)

No Powerpoint..? Really?

I mismanaged to wake up late, thanks to the brilliant ‘snooze’ function of my desi alarm. I had to iron my shirt, something that I haven’t been able to do all my life. Why is it that the most careless times of life occur when you have to make a crucial presentation to a group of lions who are waiting to tear you apart at the first available opportunity. It hadn’t stopped raining since the weekend and that meant more delay in travel. I chose not to call for the company cab – Big Mistake!

On my way up and down the hills, I finally realized why car frames need to be stronger in the UK and why wind loads in my designs here, are outrageously huge. My Indian, ‘not so used to hurricanes’, umbrella is not quite strong enough to take the British winds! After a torturous walk up to the office I noticed that I had wet shoes, wet hair, wet clothes, slightly wet eyes and 1 hour, before I would need to show my tricks to the kings of the jungle. I manage to get myself in some sort of a shape, a billion thanks to my teammates! I was planning on doing a final check on a few things but there wasn’t too much time left. Our team did a Shoaib Akhtar pace recap of what we had planned. Well, I entered the Slother Pitt room with a smile on my face and with a heartbeat faster than a Ferrari, only to find a dozen hungry eyes staring at me. I finally started with the drama.. It actually was one, We had planned a small skit before we would give them the blah blah of the technical wonders we were up to. The folks were shocked and couldn’t quite believe that we knew what a presentation meant. Well, somehow they sat there and watched with rather blank faces. I found myself chanting the Hare Krsna mantra! Luckily, it worked and I could see them getting interested. We completed the presentation (without a single slide on Powerpoint!!) and were complimented for the innovative style and some good technical breakthroughs. We got an instantaneous go ahead signal for the next stage. My google talk status message changed from “Butterflies in my stomach, sweaty palms, a dry mouth, an increased heartbeat and trembling knees!” to “Indian represents half a dozen countries, makes an Opulent presentation and the project is successfully into Stage III!”. But it wasn’t too long before I had to change it to “Ok.. No showing off” thanks to some critical comments by Mr. Varun Murali. He thinks it would make a good headline for Aajtak and India TV! I realized that I was pretty excited and so slowly emitted energy to come back to the K shell. (Ugh.. That’s a bad one! :P)

The rest of the week was superb, excellent, awesome with some very special, cute, sweet incidents (distractions?) (Just add all the other good adjectives in the world). The weather improved a little but the forecasts for the weekends were bad. In any case, me and Diwakar had decided that we wouldn’t let the raingods spoil our plans. Diwakar came in on Friday night, his bus was late and that allowed me to watch some very interesting displays of affection in the broad light of the lampposts. The weekend was perfect and we managed to click about 400 photos between ourselves! (Happy?) Clicking photos was never so much fun. At every place we would click a dozen snaps to make sure we got the best expressions! Stonehenge, Roman Bath, Royal Crescent, Royal Circus, Royal Avenue, Victoria Park etc etc. must have felt royally raped :P We also got a taste of English music and caught up with a local band.

Meanwhile, I missed a cricket match on Tuesday against the ‘Bath Lawyers” owing to my sore arm! :-( I somehow want to play the 20-20 next week and I am already getting a little sentimental about not having too many weekends left! And yes, Glasgow wouldn’t get lucky, because I am in want for company. My college starts in about 10 days from now and that means I am going to be jealous of pals who get to enjoy themselves with each other. My brother is joining college this year, and now, I need to do some fattebaaji sessions with him. :-)

See you soon!

Match Report : Sodzas v/s The Posh Teachers

-> It was a 20 over game. Every batsman had to retire after scoring 35 and would return only after everybody had spent some time in the middle. Bowlers could bowl only 4 over each! Read on..

Another match, another defeat. The sodzas haven't had a start like this since the terrible season of '52.

Stand in Crome took the toss and won! Decisions decisions, on a pitch with plenty of green decided to bat. Stand in skip Goff, wandered out of the changing rooms to discover we were batting! Drat, got to work out the order, was planning to that while fielding!

Discussed rules with the skipper- he wanted to retire at 50, we compromised at 35.

The Harrisons opened, ' are they brothers?' one of the opposition asked. Perceptive these teachers. The opening bowler reminiscent of Thompson - steamed in and Rich got stuck in, a 4 and a quick single to keep the strike. Next over similar, runs and nicking the strike, next over same again. Chris is ticking away, some remark about Richs unexpected mathmatical ability.

Their skip asks if we can reconsider the retirements - could we use 25 as instead - they are worried.

Rich retired after a quick 35. Ken Jones came out to join Chris, his first appearance for the Sodzas for many a year - some strike at last for Chris and scoring follows. Ken has two shots, swing and miss or swing and it goes miles. Luck is with the righteous, any ball up in the air drops just out of reach. Chris retires on 35, ken follows having been caught going for a big one on 34.

Neil Fletcher makes his first class debut. Bemused by a fizzer from an Aussie import 'gap year student' my arse! He's stumped by a smart piece of keeping setting their skip off on one about how the keeper always misses them of his bowling.

Cameron on his penultimate appearance make a useful contribution with Ben chipping in with a few to set a total of 146 - a good total.

The sodzas take the field, the opposition look worried. First over from Clarke who hasn't bowled this fast since 1987. An early wicket and one batsman settling in like boycott. Townsend keeps the pressure on.

Vikalp making his sodzas debut bowls well when the radar has homed in on the stumps, a player for the future no doubt.

Another wicket, brilliant run out by Cameron, better than Rhodes in his prime! A leading contender for moment of the season - he won't win 'cos he will have gone home by then!

Goff sets an attacking if unusual field. After a couple of balls proceedings stop while Goff moves the field, he just noticed the blokes a leftie!

More wickets for clarke and R Harrison - catch to Cam. Can't keep the kiwi down. Its looking good 80 required off 8.

Their wickie arrives at the crease accompanied by a chap with an afro that I suspect he's had since the 70's.

The wickie tucks in. Great bowling dispatched with disdain. Harrison and crome get the treatment. 6 into the tree, 6 into the tenis courts - good job the girls hockey practice had just finished (for more than one reason - I'm sure its been distracting the fielders)

Vik suffers an injury preventing him bowling the last two, ken is iffy but Cam steps up to the plate with his tricky off spin, attempts to confuse the batters by bowling right handed but it doesn't work, the wickies got his eye in. He retires at 35 but its too late. They win in the last over.

Goff falls on his sword and announces he is leaving the captaincy to make way for a younger man.

No Big Deal

It’s a Sunday morning and I would have been at Stonehenge if not for the rain gods blessing Bath for a straight 48 Hrs! I had a very enjoyable week at work and almost no work on Friday thanks to our super fast working speed and the holiday in Portugal of our tech lead.

My team at work is like a menu of a typical South Indian restaurant. I work with people from Denmark, France, Germany, China, Ireland, Scotland, Canada, US and of course England. It’s a funny experience to be with people from so many different countries and cultures. Yasmin, a really sweet chick makes my stomach ache with her grumpy looks when she can’t sort something out! Sarah… The Irish babe, wants me to teach her everything that she already knows. The real fun part is when I and Kai (my Chinese friend) get to our favorite pass time and do some eve teasing! I sit at the so called hot seat and I am surrounded by the fairer sex! I considered myself very lucky initially, but can’t say it’s the same any more. Lol. I am not able to take in so much of the girlie stuff all in one go.

The team is really getting along well and we have managed to complete two deadlines, when it’s not time for even one! We are also looking forward to a team outing, thanks to the generous response of our Group lead, to a tricky solution, of an intricate problem, given by the Indian in the team. :-)

I managed to play an internal cricket match and realized that I could swing the bowl in more than one way and do it pretty well! My captain for the internal game also my group leader encouraged me to play for the company & I did manage to do that! We missed on winning the game but it was still an excellent experience to play it the English way. For the interested, I will post a wacky match report!



Cricket in England is an altogether different experience! People actually stood up to clap when I came out on the wicket.. Too bad I couldn’t capture that on video! I would start cheering when we were bowling and then would realize that I am not supposed to! You are supposed to clap when the batsman hits you for a four! My Arse!

We were in the changing room and since we were playing away, we were given a makeshift changing room. It turned out that the room was used by the gals tennis team as well. So, here is what happened, Rich is cracking a joke about some gal he dated some time back when two gals barge in to collect some stuff. They open the door and look at our half naked selves! We look back, they “walk in” coolly, one female checks something on her mobile with a jejune look on her face, while the other collects her stuff and they walk out! And nothing has really happened! It’s not a big deal at all. So much for a culture shock! In any case, I wonder if it would be a big deal if I’d walk into some ladies changing room some time :P

I had to come back thirsty after the game because I didn’t find anything to drink other than Fosters, Carlsberg, Cider etc etc! Beer is just everywhere here, my office fridge has got beer, at home there is Beer! I just wish I liked beer! I have this French friend whom I share the cottage with and who keeps drinking all ‘my’ beer. Mathiew keeps telling me about French Women and how French Men are supposed to be the best in bed! His girlfriend is due in England the next weekend so let’s see if I can get a first hand look! Haha! ;)

I have to make a presentation tomorrow and I am slightly nervous because of the rather strange style that I am planning to do it in. My mom wants me to go to Europe but I don’t want to go alone. My friend, Diwakar who is now in London is coming over next weekend and we plan to have some fun moving around. I am also thinking about watching the India Pakistan match in Scotland! But not too sure about that now, the game is sold out and I would need to buy the tickets in Black! And that means very expensive *82 calculations!

I am gonna go find my calculator and get my head around this, meanwhile you can make yourself useful and help me decide.

P.S: The biz stuff will happen in a short while from now, for now I am busy researching the English Clubs and the nightlife at London!

"InternPlane"

I had a great flight! Yea, an awesome flight!! I had to rush up my packing thanks to the Indian - English Visa Authorities. Looks like they had got a taste of my university’s administration! Missing anything in my packing would mean doing multiple expensive *82 and /87 calculations. Though that might have helped my never started, always going to start next week, CAT preparation but my ‘baniya’ genes would not allow such a sacrilege! I managed to put together what I could call a decent list and then mismanaged to loose it as well. So, as I ordered and cancelled and ordered stuff over the phone to my brother who was being embarrassed in front of “all the families we know” in the supermarket, I began to feel a stupid kind of an excitement. I was going to make my first “first class” flight! Don’t be surprised, I didn’t pay for it.. :-)

Well, all said and done I don’t think this was required after an already “very attractive” offer, I really think business class was an utter waste. But it was only the beginning! I had a great inflight experience, Lovely airhostesses who would line up a dozen things for breakfast when you only asked for idly vada and stewards who will tell you that the wine is of the best quality when you refuse it! I made sure I get only Daal Chawal for lunch, watched “The Holiday” 38000 ft above the air, checked my email and took a small nap with stretched legs in my BA pyjamas! I woke up to see a perfectly blue sea called the Black sea right besides some snowy peaks, only before I slept had I seen a desert. 60 minutes later I was talking to a cheerful (read HOT) lady at the emigration desk in Heathrow Airport. My Company (read GOD) had arranged for a car and so I didn’t have to worry. But, to my shock I found Tony with a Black Mercedes Bens.. Somehow I never thought of that as a car.. :-)



I was so overwhelmed that I could not hold the camera straight! On the way out of the driveway, it finally sinked in and I was in England! The Queen’s Land! I enjoyed the countryside and Tony’s insightful description of English Beer on the way to a lovely cottage and as you might guess it’s beautiful with everything I need. (Jealous already?) I throw my luggage into the house and want to see the office, so much for enthusiasm. So I ask Tony to drop me at the office and he readily agrees! I walk up to the reception and they know I am coming. I meet my team lead who is shocked to see me after a “14 hr” journey when I am like, “it was the most comfortable time of my life”.

Anyway, I am asked to come back on Monday and I have the weekend to settle in, on the way out I am surprised sweetly to receive a welcome and relocation allowance!

(Ok Ok.. M stopping....Alright.. That’s it!)

So, yes, I am headed for a great time here (so what if it’s only 8 weeks), I hope I make the most of it. Meanwhile, I do miss Indian food, friends and family! It’s nice to be here but it’s best to be home!

Signing off, need to catch up on some English chicks. ;)

Its never too late

It sure has taken me a long time to get back to bloggin! It’s been a long long time but well I think I can proudly say that I didn’t quite find the time. The fact that I had to spend three back to back weekends in Swatantrata Bhawan (Our College Activity Hub) and did all the other things there are to do in the world, is proof enough I guess. Its been great working my heart out for the events at the Institute. It started with PraGyaN as a runup to Opulence interspersed with the Alumni Meet. Opulence was an absolutely fabulous learning experience and I am sure I made the right choice when it came to choosing between festivals. Opulence was followed by a short cameo in Technex and then of course there was SHILP. Shilp was another result of the “initiative” syndrome. Then there was IIPC stuff , A-Cell stuff.. And my visiting card (yea I got one :P) has half a dozen lines mentioning different things I did!

To say that the last year and all the effort has been a great experience would be an understatement. Untill recently, I still needed to settle bills and accounts for a couple of festivals and was also faced with more questions regarding the future course of action.

Being on the so called “top” of the organizing team has its own pleasures (& the downside is pretty bad as well..but we can leave that). You never thought you could be the centre of attention without really doing anything. People would listen to you perhaps because they have no other option. You interview juniors as if you were an MBA from Harvard working for Mckinsey! Absolute strangers come up and say ‘Hi’ and impress upon you why they should be the next guy for the job. But all said and done it’s a great learning experience. Leading a team shows you the larger picture, be it team work, delegation, execution, planning.. anything.

Well, so much about what I was upto.. & yea did I mention I got a sweet internship offer! Well, it’s a great company and might just give me a chance to do some cutting edge work! Its all nicely set up I guess. So, basically this entry is only to tell all of you out there, that I have been having a time of my life for quite some time now. Hopefully the end to this dream run is pretty far off!

Alrite, I am gonna sign off & I guess my future with blogging is pretty unpredictable. I am thinking of a new pattern altogether. What you will see is a lot of biz stuff and my theories and accurate predictions about most stuff. If you are in the stock business watch out for my perfect calls! If you are a mom and run a house please watch out for the FMCG price shifts. If you are a management student you can expect to see loads of contradictions to your textbooks. See ya Folks! (I am hopeful that the description about the future won’t bog you down!)